He is a 'real' dominant or she is a 'real' submissive. I have heard that many times. So how do we know? And what is a real dominant or submissive?
So there you have it, you can smell him when he comes close to you, you instinctually and immediately know he is a dominant. You instantly fall on your knees and submit. Easier even only a strong man can make you submit, a really strong man that suddenly overpowers you with his dominance. You simply know a good dominant in the first three sentences he says to you. Most of the men you encounter are wimps and they do not overpower you as it should happen.
When I was playing in SL in a GOR like sim it was the idea I had. Although a few would come to me to tell me it didn't work like that even in the role-play they were playing there. I didn't really understand it, I wanted something, knew instinctively I wanted something but had no idea how to get it. So I needed to look for this overpowering hunk that would simply force me to yield. I was a strong lady and my strength needed such a man.
When I started to venture into more capture role-play and BDSM like sims things changed. Slowly I understood that those strong men were also quite heartless bullies with a huge lack of empathy and care. I hand no idea of aftercare or anything and just played around in fantasy like sims where I was caught and 'raped'. Still, no fun for me. There was one I really started to talk to. He had never captured me we just talked and it was a good and pleasant conversation. He send me to a library in SL to read. That was the best things I ever heard. It slowly changed my idea of what a 'real' dominant is.
All that reading and experiencing has changed me. I no longer think there are 'real' dominants, 'natural' dominants. I think dominants, whether they are novice or very, very experienced. Should always communicate, share information be fully open on what and how they want things, so the submissive can establish if she wants to play and submit. And she should always willingly submit. Like in relationships, not all fit. Please find out all first.
Just realize that all is fine when you role-play, but would those ideas be there in your real life you might find yourself in a dangerous situation. Just always check the one you submit to, know his reputation know his home address and be sure if you ever meet him that his address is known to others too and someone know where you are and with who.
After all get REAL, you only have one life.